REESELAW BLOG

June was LGBTQ+ Pride month, a time to celebrate the diverse ways people live and love. It is also a time when many people choose to acknowledge, own, and even embrace their own LGBTQ+ identity. When this happens to a person in a committed relationship, particularly one with children, this journey involves speaking truth to loved ones who have a vision and expectations that may be disrupted by the information. It requires courage, sensitivity, and thoughtful planning. Here are some essential steps to consider:

Take the Time to Prepare, Prepare the Timing

For family and loved ones, learning about your LGBTQ+ identity means change. Understand that coming out may be surprising or challenging for them. Prepare yourself emotionally for a range of responses, from acceptance to shock or confusion. Have in mind what you want to say and share so that you can answer questions and address responses. While there are many ways to come out to loved ones, timing matters. Find a calm, private setting to have an open conversation without interruptions. Consider the emotional state of loved ones and choose a time when they can listen attentively. It is a good idea to avoid holidays or other significant events when their attention will be divided.

Approach with Grace and Compassion

When family and loved ones are learning about your identity from you, be honest and straightforward. Explain your feelings and emotions honestly. Share your journey—the self-discovery, acceptance, and self-love. Assure them that your identity doesn’t change your love for them. Allow your loved ones to express their feelings. Be patient and empathetic. Remember that their reactions may stem from fear, lack of understanding, or cultural beliefs. While listening, you don’t need to accept abuse. Respectfully establish boundaries, as you deserve kindness and respect during this vulnerable process.

Consider Potential Outcomes

You will be bringing change to your family and loved ones. Some relationships will strengthen, and loved ones may surprise you with their acceptance and support. Celebrate these moments. Others may need time to process, so be patient and understand that their feelings may evolve over time. Sadly, some relationships may end, and it is important to acknowledge this possibility. It’s painful but remember that your well-being matters.

Seek Professional Support

Before coming out to family and loved ones, consider getting professional advice about the possible consequences of coming out as LGBTQ+ and how this can impact your approach to the process.

• Mental Health Counseling: Individual or couples counseling can help navigate emotions, communication, and relationship dynamics. A trained therapist can guide you through coming out as well as help you and your spouse or partner come to terms with what this might mean for your relationship. If you have children, you should consider getting them counseling as well.
• Legal Considerations: If you have concerns that coming out as LGBTQ+ will cause change in your relationships, you may be concerned about whether your identity could have an impact on your legal rights. Consult a family law professional if you have concerns about how this may impact issues of custody of children or the divorce process.

Remember, coming out is about living authentically. Be kind to yourself and those you love. You deserve acceptance and happiness. For two decades, ReeseLaw, P.C., has been working with individuals undergoing changes in their family relationships. If you are concerned about your legal rights upon coming out as LGBTQ+, contact us for a consultation.